Monday, 16 May 2011

Hubby's Hotties - I should be so lucky, lucky, lucky, lucky...'

The machine whirred amidst a sea of canned applause. The voice called out.
     “The first ball, last drawn three weeks ago, number 16.”
I read the VCT report that came in the post earlier. Facing50 was watching the live draw.  The National Lottery, what a waste of money. £1 for a ticket and 1 chance in 14 million of winning the jackpot. Not my idea of a good investment.
     “The second ball, featured in the last two draws, number 29,”
I ignored the voice. It became a noise in the background. This VCT report was showing that I was due a dividend in June. Good, that would help pay for son’s car to be serviced. I looked up. Facing50 was sitting on the edge of her seat silently, mouth slightly ajar.
     “You okay?” I asked
She nodded, eyes shining brightly and waved her ticket at me.
     “We’ve won!”
     “Ha,ha, of course...” I started to say. Something stopped me.
     “We’ve won!” She said, more loudly.  “We’ve got all six numbers.”
     “How much is the jackpot tonight?” I choked
     “Three Million.”
Three million! Imagine the possibilities with three million pounds in the bank. I was just about to conjure up a special Designo Mercedes SLS when I woke up suddenly. I had been dreaming. Very strangely for me as I rarely dream.
     Facing50 says we all dream but I just can’t remember what I have been dreaming about. I’m pretty certain I don’t dream though. She does. When she finally conks out for ten minutes she manages to pack in full feature length dreams that would make Martin Scorsese jealous of their cinematic skills. (I had to Google a famous film producer for that last statement. I haven’t a clue who makes films!)
     I told F50 about it. She was very interested.
     “Which numbers did I play?”
     “I don’t know. There might have been a 16. I wasn’t paying attention. In the dream, you won not me, so you must have chosen the numbers.”
     “It must be a sign that we should get a ticket,” she decided.
     We never play the National Lottery as I truly believe it is a complete waste of money. I let F50 buy some Premium Bonds instead as you can at least get your stake money back on them. But, on closer inspection, I worked out that they yielded approximately 1% per annum, which technically means, by the time you factor in inflation, you may as well have a flutter on the Lottery. You’ll probably still lose your money. Ergo, if F50 thought my dream was some sort of prediction, then she could buy a ticket if it made her happy.
     The weekend drifted by and we both forgot about the Lottery draw. In fact, it was the next week when I asked her if the numbers had come up.
     “Crumbs, I forgot all about it. I’ll check on the internet.”
     Several minutes passed. I was busy sorting out a window frame that needed repainting. I despise painting with gloss paint but someone has to do it and I’m not letting Miss Astigmatism 2011 near it. There’d be paint all over the window frame. There was a clatter as she walked into the door.
     “We’ve won!” she shouted.
I nearly spilled the paint over my shoes.
     “What? Impossible!”
     “No, we’ve definitely won.”
     “How much?”
     “Let me see, we got three numbers, so that’s ten pounds.” She grinned.
I’ll have to put my SLS on hold for the moment but if I have any more dreams I’ll be sure to share them with you all.


  1. Well, ten pounds isn't as much as three million, but even that is pretty hard to get. Congratulations on that too!

    My fiance says he's had a few prophetic dreams, but that never happens to me. Who knows, maybe if you had remembered the numbers in your dream, you might have won.

  2. 10 pounds, well done! that was worth a little flutter. will it buy you a nice steak?

  3. I'm off to check my Euromillions ticket now altho £3 mill wouldn't really cut the mustard for me

  4. You are a quite a writer in your own right, do you realise that? Methinks your better half has some up and coming competition! I thoroughly enjoyed this post and I must admit, you had me grabbing the edge of my seat, too...twice! Maybe the universe is conspiring to bring that smart new SLS a little closer to home ;) I'm holding thumbs...that's crossing fingers as in pucker English-speak ;)

  5. We don´t have the lottery in this country, so I don´t get tempted. But if we did I think I´d consult with you first, then bet my numbers. haha

  6. I once was playing a slot machine in Atlantic City and I won $500. I hollered across to my husband who was playing blackjack "I won,I won". He came flying over and when he saw it was ONLY $500 he yelled at me not to scare him like that. He thought I hit the big one! $500 to me was the big one!!!! Great post.

  7. I agree with Desiree! You are becoming quite the writer sir! This was a great post. It brings to mind my honeymoon in Vegas. I had never gambled before but I wanted to try so my hubby gave me 20 dollars and I won 300. It paid for the majority of our trip. Sometimes you have to do something just for fun.

    -Dear Lavi, Thank you for comenting on my little post. I wish i could but I don't dream much at all. If I do, I must forget them as soon as I wake up. I think I'll leave all the dreaming and day-dreaming to Facing50. I'm probably too serious to dream.
    -Dear IWASNTBLOGGEDYESTERDAY, How did you guess? That is exactly what Facing50 bought with the winnings. We had steak in a peppercorn sauce. Am I that predictable?
    - Dear Jane, Let me know if you have won. I have an SLS on order just in case you feel you should share your winnings with your favourite bloggers.
    -Dear Desiree, I have a nice image of you sitting in the South African sunshine holding thumbs for me. You are very kind to say I write well. I shall inform Mrs Wannabe author that she has competition now. I was quite pleased with this post. It took a little while to prepare it so thank you. I shall cross my fingers and thubs for the SLS but not when I'm driving.
    - Dear Betty, Very wise to not play it. I can't understand the temptation myself to bet on numbers that are just not going to come up. Still many people live for that weekly draw and at least it gives them hope for a while. Someone has to win it I suppose.
    -Dear Bouncin'Barb, I would have been happy with $500 too. I once went to a casino on a 'lad's night out'. Encouraged by the others I placed one very small bet. Unable to stop they all lost lots of money but I walked away £20 richer. Better than losing hundreds. It's a mugs game!
    Dear Craziness Abounds, Again, thank you for your compliment. Yes, sometimes you should do things for fun and only bet what you can afford. When people go mad then it's a problem but for us fun loving sensible folk, gambling can be a laugh. (Especially if you win.)Congratulations on winning what I consider to be a very decent amount.

  9. Good afternoon Mr H. I am hoping that this comment finds you well, and fully recovered from the ancient tour guide that F50 forced on you during your visit to Prague!! What a good story that turned out to be. BUT, I have to say that your posts are getting better and better and that little tinker, F50, has some serious competition here. The most I have ever won was £500 on the premium bonds, which I got quite excited about. In fact, I didn't tell the hubby and put it towards a trip to Italy. Hee Hee!! Now, of course, he's learnt how to check our numbers on the internet, so I don't have any secrets any more. Grrr! Be good, and don't let that F50 give you TOO many jobs to do!!

  10. Welcome back--another funny post & a great opening cartoon! I have lots of dreams & they're very vivid. I may be confusing them with real life. In fact, my husband claims that some of my best memories never happened. My response--if they're GOOD memories, who cares?

  11. So now we're calling Carol F50 and hubby is Nostradamus of the lottery balls. This just keeps getting better! Well done on the Scorsese comparison!

  12. I throughly enjoyed your post. It had me laughing out loud and ready to congratulate you on your winnings. My Hubby recently had a dream that he won the lottery. hmmmm. He's the dreamer in the family. I rarely dream. Our odds aren't very good when it comes to the lottery. We usually get one number out of six. The closest we came was many years ago. We had four correct numbers, the other two were each one off. I think we won $200.

  13. I take my mom to bingo and sometimes dream I'm playing and I wake up yelling, "Bingo!" Great story, and as everyone has noticed, you are a terrific writer.

  14. Ah yes, I have had the lottery dream many times. Cars, homes, trips, jewels.... Well, I suppose it would help if I actually played the lottery!

  15. -Dear Thisisme, Good afternoon dear lady. I've never met anyone who has won more than £50 on the premium Bonds. I expect your husband was more than delighted with your little win. We haven't had luck like that, although F50 did win £25 a few months ago. I didn't know you could check online. I shall have to see if we have a win due now. Yes, thank you I am fully recovered and would rather like to return and have another go at Prague. I shall have to tell F50 that she must improve her standard of writing as it appears I am gaining approval here. She'll have to raise her game. As for jobs - I have one or two lined up for her that she doesn't know about yet but will keep her busy over the next couple of days.
    -Dear fishducky, I think you may be typical of women. F50 is always telling me about things I don't remember. I don't think they happened but I bow down to the female ability to recall events which seems to be infinitely stronger than male recall. You are correct, if they are good memories then what does it matter?
    -Dear Valerie, thank you. I'm not a fan of Google and I was quite pleased to find what I needed. I thought I had to keep F50 anonymous. Also she told me some people don't know who she is. I guess you are one of the elite she mentions. Just checked with her and she snorted "Of course you know Valerie - she lives in Italy some of the time and is an expert on wine." Sorry Valerie. I now feel humbled.
    -Dear Darlene, Thank you. Maybe you should now let your husband play his numbers. If it was like my dream you'll get enough for a cup of coffee each!
    -Dear Belle, Thank you to you too. I am flattered by your praise.Bingo halls here seem to consist of large ladies with large mouths and a serious expression as they cross off their numbers. I'll stick to stocks and shares.
    -Dear On My Soapbox, Yes, there is a fundamental flaw in your plan to win -you need a ticket.Alternatively you could rely on a wealthy long lost relative dying and leaving you everything...both are fairly implausible!

  16. I forgot to put that it was me replying HUBBY does one get a private logo on this thing?

  17. Men only remember what they have to--women remember EVERYTHING! And as far as your "Thank you for leaving me a comment, etc.", what makes you think you'll EVER finish all your jobs in the house? I AM glad you take time out to post your blog--I love it!

  18. Great post, Carol's genius is starting to rub off on you!

    Dear fishducky, You are right. F50 has a memory like an elephant's. As for my jobs, I get up at 5am so I'm ahead of the game on them today. I'm glad you anjoy my contributions. I'll try to stay on top of them as well.
    Dear Lazarus, Thank you sir.I daren't tell her she has a genius though.